LIVING ON THE EDGE
Ephesians 4:2-3
"With all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace."
I'm not a big fan of heights. As a matter of fact I avoid them at nearly ALL costs. While some may enjoy the so called "rush" of being on the edge of a high place on a mountain or cliff, even the thought of it makes my stomach queasy.
One time in Northwestern Colorado I was following a bull elk during archery season and suddenly came out on a rock ledge. As I broke out of the timber I was looking straight down into a 300 ft deep canyon with a waterfalls dumping into it. It should have been beautiful, but it scared me to death. My first thought was to get back as quickly as possible. My mind could see me slipping on a rock and falling over the edge, if a loose piece of the ledge let go, taking me with it. I was petrified. Even today, 25 years later, it bothers me.
Most of us would never play right on the edge of a dangerous cliff like that. We know better, right? Yet in our marriages many couples live right there on the edge all the time. Husbands and wives both staying as close to the dangerous edge of a cliff and getting more and more comfortable all the time. The problem with that is, that sooner or later if you live that close to the edge, you trip and fall.
I've seen and known couples that have loved each other and yet they push the other right out to the edge of the cliff as well. They've avoided them, either purposely or out of unconscious neglect. The emotional, spiritual and even physical needs of their partner have been pushed aside for so long that the rocks on the edge of the cliff are getting very loose. We can't let this happen in our marriages, we have to protect ourselves and our partners.
Both husbands and wives have needs... but our first and most important needs can only be met through Christ alone. I can't ask my wife to fulfill my needs and I can't fulfill her needs unless both of us are asking God to fulfill our spiritual needs first. We will never be fulfilled by any other person if we aren't being fulfilled through Him.
Have we gone too far? Is it too late? Can "we" be fixed? What a lonely place for one spouse or both. Whatever you do, don't give up. When you said your vows, you made a commitment not only to each other, but more importantly to God Himself! By throwing in the towel we've told Satan, take our marriage, I don't want it anymore. We CAN'T LET THAT HAPPEN.
Colossians 3:14: "And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity."
So one or both of you is on the edge of the cliff and the rocks are getting loose... what do you do? First, GET AWAY FROM THE CLIFF! Then make a decision to allow God full access to your marriage. Decide to pray together daily as well as read the scriptures. Treat your spouse like you want to be treated. The plan to "show him or her how you feel" is a bad plan. Show them love, go above and beyond... don't worry if they don't respond right away.... Just serve them like you want to be served. Don't give up.
Satan wants us to believe that we would be better on our own or with someone else... don't believe it, that's a lie. God will honor and bless your marriage again if you bring Him back into it. By choosing to walk the edge of the cliff or push your spouse there, you removed God from the marriage. And if we've removed Him from your marriage, we can't expect blessings in other places in our lives.
Fixing a broken relationship is never easy. What took years to divide will not be healed in days. But the great news is, like a broken bones that is healed, it is stronger once it's mended and rarely it ever breaks there again.
Malachi 4:2
"But for you who fear my name, the Son of Righteousness will rise with healing in his wings. And you will go free, leaping with joy like calves let out to pasture.
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